Quotes...

[NeoN]

"Of all the preposterous assumptions of humanity over humanity, nothing exceeds most of the criticisms made on the habits of the poor by the well-housed, well-warmed, and well-fed." - Herman Melville

"If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you; But if you really make them think, they'll hate you." - Don Marquis

"Music makes one feel so romantic - at least it always gets on one's nerves - which is the same thing nowadays." - Oscar Wilde

"Always be nice to those younger than you, because they are the ones who will be writing about you." - Cyril Connolly

[NeoN]

"All the President is, is a glorified public relations man who spends his time flattering, kissing and kicking people to get them to do what they are supposed to do anyway." - Harry S Truman

"The last time anybody made a list of the top hundred character attributes of New Yorkers, common sense snuck in at number 79." - Douglas Adams

"The absence of alternatives clears the mind marvelously." - Henry Kissinger

"Stoop and you'll be stepped on; stand tall and you'll be shot at." - Carlos A. Urbizo

[NeoN]

"The world isn't split into good people and death eaters." - Sirius Black, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

"Rational arguments don't usually work on religious people. Otherwise, there wouldn't be religious people." - Doris Egan

"The wages of sin are unreported." - Anonymous

"On my income tax 1040 it says 'Check this box if you are blind.' I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away." - Tom Lehrer

[NeoN]

"Perpetual devotion to what a man calls his business, is only to be sustained by perpetual neglect of many other things." - Robert Louis Stevenson

"The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you." - Rita Mae Brown

"The last time somebody said, 'I find I can write much better with a word processor.', I replied, 'They used to say the same thing about drugs.'" - Roy Blount Jr.

"Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody." - Mark Twain

[NeoN]

"A poet more than thirty years old is simply an overgrown child." - H. L. Mencken

"It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims." - Aristotle

"Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain." - Edward De Bono

"Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first." - Ronald Reagan

[NeoN]

"Every increased possession loads us with new weariness." - John Ruskin

"My definition of a free society is a society where it is safe to be unpopular." - Adlai E. Stevenson Jr.

"Television has done much for psychiatry by spreading information about it, as well as contributing to the need for it." - Alfred Hitchcock

"A nation is a society united by delusions about its ancestry and by common hatred of its neighbors." - William Ralph Inge

[NeoN]

"The visionary lies to himself, the liar only to others." - Friedrich Nietzsche

"Life's a tough proposition, and the first hundred years are the hardest." - Wilson Mizner

"Against logic there is no armor like ignorance." - Laurence J. Peter

"You are not superior just because you see the world in an odious light." - Vicomte de Chateaubriand

[NeoN]

"If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must Man be of learning from experience." - George Bernard Shaw

"To err is human--and to blame it on a computer is even more so." - Robert Orben

"Misquotations are the only quotations that are never misquoted." - Hesketh Pearson

"My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted." - Steven Wright

[NeoN]

"My intension has only been to entertain, nothing more." - Eisenheim, The Illusionist

"There's an old saying about those who forget history. I don't remember it, but it's good." - Stephen Colbert

"Sometimes people carry to such perfection the mask they have assumed that in due course they actually become the person they seem." - W. Somerset Maugham

"We are inclined to believe those whom we do not know because they have never deceived us." - Samuel Johnson

[NeoN]

"Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese." - G. K. Chesterton

[NeoN]

"Statistics: The only science that enables different experts using the same figures to draw different conclusions." - Evan Esar

"When the politicians complain that TV turns the proceedings into a circus, it should be made clear that the circus was already there, and that TV has merely demonstrated that not all the performers are well trained." - Edward R. Murrow

"Some for renown, on scraps of learning dote, and think they grow immortal as they quote." - Edward Young

"Censorship, like charity, should begin at home; but, unlike charity, it should end there." - Clare Booth Luce

[NeoN]

"I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays." - Henny Youngman

"An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do." - Dylan Thomas

"In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite." - Paul Dirac

[NeoN]

"I believe that every human has a finite number of heart-beats. I don't intend to waste any of mine running around doing exercises." - Buzz Aldrin

"The penalty for success is to be bored by the people who used to snub you." - Nancy Astor

"'Tis better to be silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt." - Abraham Lincoln

"There's a difference between a philosophy and a bumper sticker." - Charles M. Schulz

[NeoN]

"On the Internet, nobody knows you're a dog." - Peter Steiner

"Every man is wise when attacked by a mad dog; fewer when pursued by a mad woman; only the wisest survive when attacked by a mad notion." - Robertson Davies

"I believe that professional wrestling is clean and everything else in the world is fixed." - Frank Deford

"I wish people who have trouble communicating would just shut up." - Tom Lehrer

[NeoN]

"White Russian, no ice, no vodka... hold the Kahlua." - Catwoman

"The supreme irony of life is that hardly anyone gets out of it alive." - Robert Heinlein

"Rudeness is the weak man's imitation of strength." - Eric Hoffer

"She was a woman who, between courses, could be graceful with her elbows on the table." - Henry James

"The author of the Iliad is either Homer or, if not Homer, somebody else of the same name." - Aldous Huxley